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Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life
(german edition)
by Marshall B. Rosenberg
A reading log.
Part 2
November 16th, 2023
Conflicts often arise when observations are mixed with judgments. Many people express their annoyance directly in the judgment without formulating their observation. This means that the other person has no chance of understanding where exactly they have caused the annoyance.
Chapter 4 " Recognizing and expressing feelings", page 71
November 19th, 2023
Many people are unable to express their feelings. Instead, they judge and condemn. But when they are able to express their feelings, they are amazed at the effect.
Chapter 4 " Recognizing and expressing feelings", page 77
November 20th, 2023
There really are many words to express feelings, but many people don't know them. Instead, we use words like "misunderstood" or "worthless", which are not feelings, but thoughts, i.e. interpretations of feelings. An important first step in NVC could be to learn this vocabulary and assign it to real feelings.
Chapter 4 " Recognizing and expressing feelings", page 90
November 21st, 2023
Everything people say can be a trigger. Our reaction shows our feelings. But we often don't verbalize our feelings. Instead, we blame the other person for our feelings or accept the trigger (accusation). This either makes us angry or lowers our self-esteem. Instead, we should formulate what we feel in our reaction and thus take responsibility. Feelings point to our needs.
Chapter 5 "Taking responsibility for our feelings", page 103
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